Every so often I find myself thrown/pummeled into a world that I do not know. One that I very easily forget even exists. Whenever this happens I am utterly amazed at how so many different worlds can coincide side by side simultaneously, but they do.
Last week I made the plunge with Lake…got the antibiotics. I deemed them as necessary…fine. I should have thought twice about the fact that they were bright pink, hmmm, when I first picked them up, but I forgot. I forgot because my head was spinning with reality, right? I had one thing in mind, and that was that Lake had Lyme and I was trying to digest as much info as quick as I could and make a well rounded decision. Pink stuff it was. I started the antibiotics the same day he was diagnosed, but once my thoughts started to settle, I started to wonder…what was in those antibiotics? Why were they bright pink? And why the heck do they NOT list the ingredients on the prescription anywhere? Don’t they want anyone to know what they are shoveling into their child’s mouth? My conclusion…of course not, silly, you’re dealing with the medical industry *cough* business.
I decided to call good old Rite Aid and ask them, because aside from my question on why the medicine was bright pink in color…I had completely forgotten to ask about gluten, or lactose, or what other potential allergen triggers might be lingering in my boy’s medicine. I called and asked them to read me the ingredients…it included a long list of things that I did not recognize which I will deem as fillers, chemicals, a lot of red dye #s, sugars, artificial flavorings and colorings! What the?!! This is what they call medicine?! Oy vey!
Due to the fact that I reside in the “other” world, the one where I easily forget that things like red dye #’s even exist…I become naive to believe that a.)my doctor would remember to only prescribe a medicine that my kid wouldn’t be allergic to (WRONG) and b.)that medicines shouldn’t have ingredients that would likely kill you anyways. I know, that’s extreme, but seriously, what about kids who are on antibiotics often? Does the medical industry honestly think it is in the children’s best interest to include this crap in their medicines? Um, NO! Of course not. Since when does red dye #4 cure illness?!
The pharmacist told me that she couldn’t tell me if the medication was gluten free or not and that they only made it with all the artificial ingredients…it cannot be made any other way she told me. I got off the phone confused. What the heck do people do? I know these things bother some people out there. And I know gluten free people somewhere take medications. I devised a search plan. I called CVS to talk to their pharmacist. She told me not to worry, that there are no red dyes in the medicine, it is simply a chemical reaction when mixing the powder with the water. Hmmm, I didn’t bother to tell her that I had just gotten read the damn ingredients which clearly listed the red dye #s. I kindly got off the phone, worried even further to think that this was a pharmacist not knowing what she was talking about. I just got increasingly worried about other people who get told the wrong things! I read in a book I have about how they put fillers in all medications. Even capsules! You’d think they were just powdered antibiotics, but now they are mixed with modified corn starch, wheat, or tapioca powders…wierd and completely unnecessary. My search concluded, hours later, in finding a pharmacy 45 minutes away who had the “dye free” liquid version available that claimed to be gluten free “to the best of the manufacturers knowledge”. It still had tutti frutti artificial flavoring, but the list of chemical additives was significantly less and there were no dyes. I felt like it was the best I was going to be able to do and let it rest.
‘Round the corner comes Halloween. For all of our trick or treating experiences we have been lucky enough to go trick or treating in my parent’s neighborhood where my (very helpful and loving) mother distributes some fruit leathers, gluten free pretzels, gluten free cookies, and chocolates for my kids. It’s “healthy” junk food, which anymore I just feel like fruits and veggies are the only real snacks one should eat. But Halloween is supposed to be fun, right? And this way my kids can look in their bags and see some things that they can actually eat. Second door we get to…the woman, who is Celiac, declares that Skittles are gluten free…so are Starburst…here take some. Gulp! Thanks. We smile and walk away. My kids are elated.
Really?
Can we eat them?
I say, remember how I called all over trying to find medicine without dyes in it for Lake last week?
Yea.
Well all those dyes are in those candies. They aren’t good for you.
So what? Can we eat them?
*Sigh* Fine.
I’m defeated. I don’t know where to draw the line. These two worlds, mine and the “normal” one, are hard to straddle. They mesh, they cross, they coincide at all the wrong times. Or am I just completely anal? We get back and my kids want to eat their candy. We quickly sort and divide and leave just a couple packs of colored crap that they savor with each bite. Ewww, I think and I leave the room so I do not have to see them eat that crap.
With any aspect of parenting, I know I can only do so much. I am only human. I have my own thoughts and beliefs, but realize that they need to ebb and flow within the worlds we live. Without allowing that room for shifting, there builds chaos. If I do not ever let my kids touch this crap…they will only want it more, someday when they are further out of my reach. So, I figure, I’ve got to let them have just a little bit every once in awhile. Right? Part of me feels like the meanest mom in the world. Honestly, Bella got so sick on the ride home…it made me happy. We gave her a huge dose of probiotics to help her balance out the sugar when we got home. She kept saying how she shouldn’t have eaten all that candy. Lesson learned, by her, which will amount to a whole lot more than my words telling her that stuff is crap. I just get mad sometimes at the things that exist in our world. The things that are completely unnecessary. The things “they” put into our foods, medicines, water…even the air we breathe. Why? It doesn’t make sense to me.
However, I can’t live in a hole. I can’t keep my kids in a hole. I cannot keep them from everything I do not want them to touch. I can explain. I can inform. I can show them how to make good decisions. I can do the best that I can do…and life goes on. And no, there are no artificial red # dyes in my canned beets…just water and a little Himalayan sea salt.
{ 22 comments… read them below or add one }
Discovering what is in things has been a journey in and of itself. It began with vegetarianism, veganism, all the way to where we are now…in conscious eating. Just how close to the original source are the things we eat? If it has any words in the ingredients that we do not understand…should we be eating/using it? What good are these things are the processes to create them for our world and our environment? Oh boy…I could keep going. The thing is that I do not feel we should even need to think like that. It should be common sense that things that are not good for us or our environment should not exist! But for now, they do…and it's up to us to figure it out and read the labels.
Lisa
I think that too…especially with my 7 year old. She tend sot be very impulsive and a pleaser. It is confusing to figure out which way would be a safer route, but I definitely don't want her to hide everything from me when she gets older or go off and binge on crap. She's definitely my girl who needs to be told just how rotten things are for you and specifics.
Lisa
Ugg! It seriously is poison. Our bodies are already overburdened by stuff we encounter everyday…they do not need anything more to process. I agree about the brainwash too. We do not have a tv, so it makes it worse when we go somewhere where there is a tv, we are much more sensative, to see what the ads and comercials are telling people…its wierd and scarey where our society is. So far from my mentality! So far from "normal"!
Lisa
I have come to the conclusion that we may be doomed either way. In my own life growing up I got to a point where I thought why didn't my mom x,y,z…or why didn't she x,y,z…that was until I came to my ownrealizations about myself and what I wanted to see in my life. So, I figure we need to make the decisions that make sense for us and our families and then someday hopefully our kids will understand too.
Lisa
Ha! I gave out stickers and pencils for Halloween. We weren't home though to hear if people groaned or not. We don't see many trick or treaters here anyways. If so they were most likely little kids who hopefully liked stickers!
Lisa
Yes inconvenience indeed. I had to have our doctor call in three prescriptions so I could get it right…I though tthey were most likely rolling thier eyes at me, but oh well. I do also believe things are changing. Sometimes it can feel overwhelming, but it is happening all around us.
Lisa
I know! Lyme is scarey. I am hoping that since we caught it right away we won't have to think about all the after effects. I think it is worst when you do not catch it and it runs rampant through your body. I belive where we live, we have one of the highest tick populations in the world or something. But we love to be out in nature and we aren't going to hide in our house our whole life! That's where more of my need for balance falls into play!
Lisa
i feel good that we made it till my oldest was 11 to even know what Skittles and Starburst are. That is huge in comparrisson to the "norm". But then all the other siblings naturally get introduced to things at a much younger age. I agree that it gets much harder as they get older, but I figure if we lay solid groundwork…they can better understand our reasoning when they get there and be able to think adn talk about the food we eat and where it comes from, etc. as well.
Lisa
Thank you! What a compliment! I find that sometimes it can be very challenging to be a mom…with all that responsibility and stuff, but at the same time remain human…living in this world. Tough stuff, but I try my best and that's what I can do. Thanks for your encouraging words!
Lisa
Birthday parties can be tricky. We are lucky that the whole gluten free thing has become relatively "normal" so we do not always have to take all our own food, but as for the rest of it….so not "normal"! It makes me happy though to see that more and more people are wondering why certain ingredients exist in foods. Yuck!
Lisa
It can be hard to let them learn the lessons on their own, but that way the lessons mean something to them. And yes! Lucky you! Wondering if the candy basket is still untouched! Thankfully ours are almost empty!
Lisa
I worry about this in small ways for me and my partner but because we don't have children and because we currently live firmly implanted in "the real world" I haven't made any great strides to change it. We avoid all medicines and vaccines but this inspires me to take a deeper look into what we are consuming. Thank you!
-Jessa http://riotousliving.com
Man, I hear you. I get so frustrated that even infant pain killers are stuffed with dyes and sweeteners. It baffles me. And, I feel similarly to you with the Halloween candy, but also give in and let Finn enjoy some gross dyed sugar for a few days following Halloween… I also think that if I restrict him from it completely, he will turn 18, leave home, and binge on junk food!
I can absolutely relate as well. I'm more rigid and won't give in to letting them eat the junk, I just give them options that don't involve gmo, corn syrup and artificial crap. And I fully explain what these chemicals do in the body. They already get a belly ache and a crabby mood with organic sweets, that they understand it's not something their body wants in it regularly anyway. While I don't think you were wrong for giving in and letting them have some, I don't think you are wrong either if you choose to no allow them to eat toxic foods. As long as they fully understand why they are toxic, and that it's a matter of protecting them not depriving them. There are plenty of yummny sugary options for kids without the chemicals that are TRULY an indulgence and treat. The chemical junk isn't a treat, it's a sugar coated poison. As much as others may think it odd to never allow a child to have these things, that's simply a matter of a societal brainwash. As one should really think it an odd idea that allowing children the joy of consuming poison is somehow going to give them a "normal" childhood.
I can totally relate to you. My family and I are vegan and we live in a farming community. We are total freaks around here and I don't always know it until I go into town and see that we are different from everyone (or so it seems). We also home school and have our own kind of spirituality. I didn't want to take my daughters out for Halloween this year, but they really wanted to and anywhere we went people asked if they were going out trick or treating. My oldest daughter gets confused because she doesn't know how to respond. It is so hard for me because I don't want her to grow up thinking that what other people are doing is bad or to feel bad about how we live. So we went trick or treating for the fun of it and have the candy hidden from them. I wonder sometimes if I am anal too or if I am just crazy. I also wonder if they will grow up and hate me for raising them 'differently'. I appreciate all of your posts and you always inspire me.
No Lisa, you're not anal. This is what I struggle with every day. I can't even go into a regular store. It's like every isle is junk food. I gave out pretzels for Halloween this year and I heard a groan from more than one kid. However, I heard some kids that liked pretzels. We just have to stick to our guns. We know what's right. We have to stick together! xo
Good for you mama, for getting to the bottom of the medicine issue! Love that!
I think the whole thing is maddening. It shouldn't be so hard to live in our world and not be constantly bombarded with all of these unhealthy items, or made to feel like an "other" if we choose to not consume certain things and would rather put health and nutrition into our bodies. It makes me crazy that rather than being admired or congratulated for our choices, we are often made to feel like an inconvenience. It's all so odd, but I do admire your lifestyle and the lessons you are teaching your children. Hopefully if we can all raise our kids with those lessons things will start to change. Sometimes that changes seems painfully slow or nonexistent, but I have to believe it's happening, even in little ways.
-Sara-
balance, mama.
I think you're right in letting them have a few bites or few pieces of the colored candy. It's a treat, not an everyday thing and allowing it once in a while takes away the allure of it later.
I also think you are right on giving Lake the antiobiotics (but wow at the process! I never would have thought of dyes or fillers!!) a friend of mine, a grown man, got lyme disease and it knocked him on his butt for months. He was in the hospital for 6 weeks and at home with a nurse and IV for another 6 weeks. If it can do that to a grown man, it terrifies me to think of what it can do to a child (I'm currently dealing with these fears at my own home – a LOT of ticks around this year, and a newborn in the house)
It's all about finding that balance and it seems like you are doing a good job with it!
Right there with you. It so often feels like we are fighting a battle that we shouldn't need to fight. So far my 4 yo understands the difference between real color and fake color. While trick or treating, one house had m&m's. She got her treat, noticed it was m&m's (= fake color), and kindly put it back in the bowl! We have a swap out at home where I trade good chocolates and other treats in exchange for the horrible stuff (right into the garbage). I continue to emphasize that I'm happy for her to have treats, I just want them to be good for her as well. Hopefully she doesn't feel "deprived". As she gets older I suspect that it will get harder and harder. Sigh…
You are a wonderful person, Earth Mama. After reading the above post I went to your "about" page and read your mission statement: "I want them to learn ALL that life has to offer them, in the "real world". I want them to see that anything is possible if you put your mind, effort, and intentions into it."
I think you are doing a terrific job giving your kids the opportunity to learn find their own way between your world and completely different realities that exist beside it. Even if that hurts and makes you gag at times when the "other world" intrude into yours. You are showing your kids (and readers!) how you can think for yourself and choose a non-mainstream life with all struggles, misunderstanding, bafflement and also with all health choices, quality of life, and pure joys and conscious living that come with it. You are doing great!
I struggle with this too and have come to a place where our home is completely free of all such dyes, additives, etc. and because my children don't have allergies I let my guard down and don't make a big deal out of indulgences at other kids birthday parties, pot lucks, etc.
But, I know it is so much harder for those with allergies and chemical sensitivities.
And, it's nice to know I'm not alone in thinking all these things that are 'normal' couldn't be any further from normal. That there are chemicals, additives, and dyes in children's medicine that are known to be harmful is so sad.
Yes it is difficult but I think you did the right thing in letting them have a bit of it. They'll learn on their own how they feel after they eat it. My little one went trick or treating to 12 houses, came home so happy and didn't eat a thing (although I allow it) and hasn't asked for her candy basket yet. Lucky me.